A night like tonight...

Things have been busy, but somehow managable on the diabetes front and so, we live.. day to day, moment to moment, like my son and so many other diabetics and parents of t1 kids.. we do what we do each day and night.

tonight, I remember why I used to be scared of diabetes... because tonight after watching a show to stay up the extra 3o minutes to be able to check my son at a reasonable time to know if I could go to bed early rather than be on BG call all night... I checked him, like I always do... most of the time he is in range, sometimes needs a bit of a correction.. not gonna lie, sometimes a bit low.. like other nites, tonights low was not alarming, but oddly his reaction when I tried to wake him was... he was barely lucid... he was able to drink the carbs (thankfully - no glucagon needed).. but kept doing some other really illogical movements and his speech was totally not english, or understandable for that matter... that scared me...

I am going to check him again soon (after 15 minutes) but I had to blog from my quiet house while everyone else sleeps, because that moment like others in the past reminded me of how scary diabetes can be.. and how the nights were so scary for so long... and I don't think I took the other quiet nights for granted.. but I did forget how scary it can be.. that if I had fallen asleep or 'did not feel like getting up' (Hasn't happened but I can see how it could) to check on my little boy... it could have been very different for the rest of our lives..

It is a disease that is totally manageable, but totally unpredicatable...kind of an oxymoron (or ironic) ...

Kiss your babes tonight for me, and I am sending out good vibes and love and support to those who like me, have a night where... it could have all changed, but didn't.. and the kids are none worse for the wear.. but the parents roll over and curl under the blankets like children and try and find comfort... and love... and strength, until they wake up and check thier sleeping children again, or see thier smiling shining faces in the morning.